Hooks for People Who Hate Meditation

A lot of your best users do not identify as meditators. They identify as people who are annoyed and still downloaded you. Write to that person.

Hooks

• "You don't have to call it meditation."
• "Sit there and be bad at it. The timer still ends."
• "No singing bowls, if that's what put you off."
• "You can hate the voice and still use the timer."
• "This is closer to a stretch than a belief system."
• "Skip the part where we tell you to be grateful."
• "For the friend who rolled their eyes at the last app."
• "Two minutes, so the cringe doesn't have time."

Match the product

If the app opens with a chant, these hooks are a lie. Either offer a plain timer up front or pick a different audience. The skeptic will uninstall in the first ten seconds and quote your ad in the review.

Tone

Dry is fine. Mocking people who like meditation is not. You are giving a reluctant person a door, not starting a fight with the rest of the category.